Dr. Jeannie Bertoli - Marriage & Family Therapist

How I do Therapy

I ascribe to a theory called Bowenian family systems theory. The basics of the theory are (in no particular order):

Understanding why we do things that lead to undesired results,

Shifting away from those patterns in order to have more of what we want

Understanding that we have responsibility for what we have and feel

Relationships are created by all the people in the relationship and all are responsible for the state of that relationship

Learning the way relationship patterns are maintained and seeing how we can shift those to meet out needs

I believe in self-determination. We, as adults, make the choices that determine our lives. With each choice, comes consequences, and by each choice, you choose not to have the other options. It is very unlikely that you will have everything you want at any one point in your life.

The environment in which you were raised, generally has a significant impact on who you are today – both positively and negatively. Your family has passed on to you strengths and weaknesses, resiliencies and challenges. These may be entrenched in your life, but they are changeable.

Just because you currently have some characteristic or habit (e.g., anger problems, sadness, etc.) does not mean that this is “just the way you are.” We all develop patterns that worked at some point in time, that no longer work for us – these are changeable.